Monday, January 31, 2005

Nothing much.....just saying hello and some other stuff

Hey y'all what's going on?

I'm getting geared up for Troy's play: A Real Nigga Show in Baltimore starting this Thursday.It runs for two consecutive weekends February 3-13.

The actors are amazing,and you will leave the theatre knowing exactly why these young actor /writers named their play in this manner.

It is highly entertaining and thought provoking.

Please join us.

For ticket prices and other details call:

The Theatre Project
(410) 539-3091
45 W Preston St
Baltimore, MD 21201

My producer and friend Rex Rideout is nominated for a Grammy Award for producing the Forever,For Always For Luther tribute CD for Verve Records!!

I was so proud to be able to vote for him since I am a member of  NARAS!

I'll definitely be watching the Grammy's this year and waiting by the phone for Rex!..

In other news,I just got an email from Incognito with some interesting tour dates,one of them being the Jakarta Jazz Festival.YES! I said Jakarta. I'm very surprised it's still happening,but maybe the proceeds are going to helping the survivors of the Tsunami.

Then we are off to Spain,Germany,and back to the Milan Blue Note for 6 nights.

I was just in California recently trying to record a song for a producer on the EMI label and my cold would not let me work at all.We tried anti-biotics,cold medicines...steam baths ..everything,but my nose was in the way. So I have to find some time at the end of Feb to finish my vocal.

While I was out there,I let an opportunity slip through my fingers and I guess writing it in my diary may help me get over it.

The hotel I was staying in had an ABC Network Winter Press Day in which different televsion shows had talent and directors and producers come out to do press on their projects.(Desperate Houswives were there too!)

Well it's no secret that I have been trying to get on The Oprah Winfrey show since I was on there with Stevie Wonder(singing background) when he was promoting Jungle Fever with Spike Lee in 1991.

Well... Oprah Winfrey and Halle Berry were both in the hotel at 11:00 am doing press for their production of Their Eyes Were Watching God.(By the way,I saw it on close circuit tv in my room the night is wonderful!)

So since they showed the whole daily schedule on the hotel page on TV,I saw that they were going to be in the conference rooms downstairs at 11.

I had all of my promotional materials with me,my cd's calendars,bio's..etc..and I made two of them. I talked myself into just walking up to them after they were finished,introducing myself,and handing them my cd's.I thought  to myself,at least maybe Oprah would be interested in my position as RSV Awareness Spokesperson.

Well by the time 11am rolled around,I had convinced myself that I was too scared of rejection to even try,and at 11:55 am I found myself at Jerry's Deli,half eating some pancakes,and disappointed in myself for letting that chance go by.That may have changed my whole career,but what I found out about myself was that I absolutely cannot take anymore rejection in this business.I have been paying dues for nearly 14 years.

I recently have been upset at the lack of radio play my CD is getting.There was a time when certaim stations like WHUR in DC and BET would play me all day long and now I never hear myself on the radio anymore.Its so hard to take ,I can't even explain it to you. It feels like someone out there is making it their mission to block me from all avenues of success with my music.If y'all only knew how many times doors have been slammed in my face even with my success with Incognito,and all the critcial acclaim of my music.

I emailed The Tom Joyner Show,(Smooth Sailing is perfect for promotion of his you can line dance to it) I called Cathy Hughes at Radio One,trying to get some kind of support from Black owned sources,but I know that its a far bigger ax to grind than just me calling.I know how radio works now,and until I sign with another label,I  will always be in this position.(One thing I did learn is that if alot of people keep calling into stations they will play it if they add it to the playlist)....

But I can honestly say that I am TIRED. I love making music,I love singing live,I love doing interviews,and promotions,but this uphill battle is wearing me down and I have exhausted all of my energy.

That's depressing to say the least,even though I am looking at a few record deal offers,which is positive.At least people still want to hire me to sing.

I don't know what else to do but lean on God a little more each day and pray that he inspires someone down here to help me not let my music just die out without getting the exposure it deserves.

I resolved to stop cussing this year.I'm doing okay I guess.In this diary at least..I have slipped up in real life! LOL

I'm already listening to songs for the new cd..I haven't been inspired to write anything as of yet,but it will come soon.

Also,I am continuing my work with RSV Awareness..I just did a pre interview for a Discovery Health Channel show called Amazing Births..!

The Public Service Announcement that I did with Jazz and my band has been shown to 140 million people already.CNN added it and NBC will start showing it soon. Out of The Blue is featured throughout the PSA which is really cool.That could start the sales of OOTB up again.

So there is some good news...but I just want to see the fruit of my know what I mean.

Thanks to you guys being so supportive,I'm at least still in the game.

And if there are some people hell bent against me seeing any further success in my career can just kiss my bumper! No weapon formed against me shall prosper. I have been a faithful servant of my God and I know that things will change for the betterment of my life and my family's lives.I know that if I keep making positive music,everything is gonna be alright.

I'm okay..thanks for listening.

(and God ,please send me my husband.Amen) :)

Love ya...